As I've grown older, there is a benefit in video gaming I've discovered, which I hadn't realized I would get when I started playing them. Let me explain at length.

There was an Albertsons that was the centerpiece of an open-air mall down the street from the apartments where I once lived. My mom went there just about every day to buy something, and I would be dragged along. I got to know that area real well. Next to it was a Hallmark, a tanning salon, and a PayLess Drugs (later renamed "Rite-Aid"). Around the corner was a laundromat called "Captain Clean" that we had to venture to during a horrible blizzard when the apartment washing machine quit working. I was there for hours watching the demo mode of the Ms. Pac-Man tabletop machine cycle over and over.

Recently, I went back to that same mall because a fairly independent used game store had taken up residence where the Captain Clean used to be...and it was alone. The Albertsons had been Economy'd into oblivion and its windows were bleakly empty. The Hallmark and the tanning salon had since left, becoming a singular Blockbuster (and I don't have to tell you what happened then). The Rite-Aid was still there but it wasn't exactly crowded inside. The whole area was dead.

It's an unavoidable fact of life that everyone experiences sooner or later: the Earth is constantly shifting and changing, and anything that's there one moment will look drastically different ten years from now, if it's there at all.

But the world of a video game never changes.

Your old virtual stomping grounds will always remain the same. You boot up Super Mario Bros, and the first Goomba appears for you to stomp, as always, like clockwork. You turn on the Legend of Zelda, move one screen up and the Octoroks materialize from nowhere, just like they did when you were 7. It's enough to bring a tear to your eye. When you replay an old game, your mind always teleports you back to the year when you first played it....and it's awesome. You CAN go back, and games make it possible.

This is why, when I have kids, they are DEFINITELY becoming gamers. It's for their own good.
"But Da-ad, I wanna do my homework!"
"SIT DOWN AND PLAY THAT LEVEL."

I don't care what you think. The reality is, out of every game I've ever played, none have impacted me so greatly as Final Fantasy VII did. It and the PSOne were purchased with graduation money and I started the game hideously depressed over how bad the college experience was going so far. All the stories of instant friends and endless parties were lies, LIES! I was now faced with the reality that my entire teenage years were going to most likely be spent alone.

The game somehow understood. In much the same way that Kurt Cobain wrapped a comforting blanket of I've-been-there among the disaffected youth just a few years prior, I instantly identified with the grungy tone of the first five hours. (Anxious Heart is my "Smells Like Teen Spirit.") Then the plot started twisting in places I'd never seen a story go before. Based on my prior experience with video games I was being led to believe the whole game was divided into eight Mako Reactor missions, but then Cloud fell through the scaffolding midway through the second one. Then the girl he met down there was kidnapped and the party rushed right into Shinra Headquarters, an event I wasn't expecting until near the end. The game already had my attention when, on top of everything else, Sephiroth appeared and killed the Shinra president, leaving an ominous trail of blood throughout the area. Then everybody escaped and WOW, that entire expansive city was just a dot on a large map full of places to explore?? Insane!

You probably want to know what I thought of Aeris/th. Sadly, at this point, the truth about her was wide open and out there, and I'd been spoiled. BUT on Disc 2 (avert your eyes if you've never played this game), Seppy led Cloud to believe he was a clone, causing Cloud to turn traitor and awaken the Weapon Monsters, then fall into the Lifestream and become a vegetable. Then Sephiroth successfully summoned the meteor!! THEN Shinra pinned the blame on Avalanche and Barret and Tifa were about to be PUBLICLY EXECUTED!!! All within ten minutes. I could barely gasp for air. The game packed plenty of surprises other than the Big One.

Later on I bought another game, but I didn't open it for two weeks because I was engrossed into replaying FFVII a second time. I loved it just as much in reruns as I did when it was new to me. (That's a rare quality in a JRPG.) I still have a save file from my first playthrough, at Sector 7 Slums just before the gang boards the train. Every so often, I load it up, run past the train station into the train graveyard, and soak up the angst.

People think that just because this is my favorite game, it makes every other opinion of mine in the world of games invalid. To the rest of you I say: get off your high horse. This is still a solid game with one of the best-written, most heartfelt storylines in the entire series. I've never played an FF title that impacted me in the same way since.

Oh, and while I'm inviting persecution, Juno is a great movie.

 

When I think about Portal 2, I get depressed. Know why? Because the game was just SO GOOD that I get bummed out I can never play it for the first time again. True. It doesn't help that there's no other game out there like it (except for Portal 1). It REALLY doesn't help that the DLC is all co-op and no one will play with me.

Spoilers follow.

One of the best moments in my entire gaming "career" was when I thought the game was winding down and Wheatley had been put in his rightful position in place of GLaDOS...only for him to turn against Chell suddenly and smash the elevator she was in all the way down the shaft. Deep in the basement, I had no idea what to expect, and I spent a while exploring the wreckage until I noticed all the "KEEP OUT" signs off in the distance. Thinking they must contain a boss, I maneuvered my way over there with portal tricks, continuing to follow the warning signs until I found a gigantic vault door. Given that this was the first time in the game I was completely alone, it was all sort of eerie. I opened that door to find...a tiny little door, and through there I found a large pool, where I was certain I'd have to battle a squid of some sort. Instead, nothing happened. I felt stuck, and my only lead was a half-open door with a portal-able wall just barely visible on the other side. I made my way through, and found a giant switch to throw, which I figured would release the squid so I could go back outside. Instead, it turned on all the lights ahead of me, revealing a giant 50's-era Aperture sign and, for the first time, the pre-recorded voice of Cave Johnson. The slow realization of what was happening, and the new spin being suddenly put on the puzzles, was terrific. I loved everything that followed.

 

Link's Awakening was the first Zelda game I ever played and remains my favorite to this day. I've replayed it more times than I've replayed any other game with a linear narrative. And I'm not just attached to it because it's my first. Despite the primitive hardware, this game has a life to me that few other Zeldas have. It's full of secrets and easter eggs that I didn't find for years. The writing is incredibly good; better than any other game in the series in my opinion. And the cruel twist midway through the game was unforgettable.

So how come this one turned out this way while none of the others since have? According to the producers, they had just finished Link to the Past and wanted to take the edge off, so they just goofed around with ideas for this game and put in whatever amused them. They remark that it could never happen today. ...Why can't they have actual fun more often?

 

Final Fantasy Adventure, more accurately known as the first title in the Mana series, is a masterpiece of repeating tiles. I absolutely adore this game for its ability to make so much out of so little, and somehow compel you to care about the events that happen despite the stilted translation and limited dialogue.

One quest in the game has you searching for the tears of a Medusa so you can cure somebody in one of the towns turned to stone. A woman named Amanda accompanies you, and after you find Medusa and slay her, Amanda cries out that she was bitten by her and if you don't kill her right there, she'll turn into a Medusa herself. The game makes you push the button to swing your sword and kill Amanda -- otherwise you can't continue. They were able to make such powerful scenes with such limited graphics. In my personal ranking of best Game Boy games of all time, FFA is just below Link's Awakening -- other than that, nothing is better.

The Final Fantasy connection was there to sell the game (it has a Chocobo in it, and that's all) but after it did well, Square was able to sell it as its own brand with its SNES sequel, Secret of Mana. The plot isn't as strong, but it's also a favorite of mine for different reasons. The gameplay is just as good, and the music is the best I've heard on any Super NES title. Best of all, most of the enemies from Adventure return, including the ducks with the military helmets.

Final Fantasy Adventure is not yet available on the 3DS's Virtual Console, but give it time. Secret of Mana is for sale on several devices, including the iPad.

 

Snake Eater is the best game in the Metal Gear Solid series. The story stands on its own, with no confusing callbacks or ten-minute-long discussions of conspiracy theories (a frequent MGS problem, except here). The bosses are some of the most creative I've ever fought, especially The End, which there is nothing like in any other game in the whole world. The game's climax is the closest I've had a video game come to authentically replicating the thrilling end of an action movie (many have tried, all have failed). But the best thing about it is the gameplay. Sneaking around in the thick grass, slowly creeping closer, inch by inch, to a clueless guard....this never gets old. I love the whole camoflauge gimmick to pieces.

I heart Snake Eater so much that I've bought every incarnation of it...except maybe the original, technically, since it was won from a contest. I then played it a second time with the extremely rare 3-disc Limited Edition. Then they released it in HD, and again in 3D, and you'd think I'd get sick of the same game four times, but no. When they re-release it for Holodecks, I'm there. I'll never get tired of Snake Eater!

 

"I know why Chrono Trigger's there, but unless I'm mistaken, didn't you read Chrono Cross the riot act ten years ago?" Yes, but that was ten years ago. The thing's kinda grown on me.

Make no mistake -- I still don't think it's a satisfying sequel to Chrono Trigger, especially with the whole "kill off everyone from the first game" problem. But gosh darn it, there's also so much the game does better than all others. The tropical setting and handpainted backgrounds are breathtaking, and the music? This is the greatest video game soundtrack of all time. OF ALL TIME.

And it not only gives you a New Game Plus when you finish -- like few games do -- it gives you a FAST FORWARD BUTTON. It's the only game to think about how badly you need that!

 

To be honest on this one...I haven't finished it. I never got around to buying Metroid Fusion when it came out. I inherited it through the 3DS "sorry you paid $250" Ambassador Program, along with nine other games...which I haven't gotten to yet because I've been so engrossed in Metroid Fusion. A lot of people say Super Metroid is the best Metroid game, but...truthfully, I'm enjoying this one even more.

Super Metroid is the preferred #1 because more gamers like the non-linear exploration-encouraged style of gameplay. This one shepherds you around on a set path, but I think for the type of plot, it couldn't be avoided....and what a plot! More than any other Metroid, this game has me constantly on edge. Samus is on a ship infested with blobby floaty things called X Parasites that can assume any shape. They're wreaking havoc throughout the ship, and anything could be around the next corner. To make matters worse, an X Parasite is impersonating Samus, is on the hunt for her, and is fully powered up! (She, as always, has lost her power-ups yet again and must collect them.)

The only downside is that in the later areas I'm in, the difficulty has become far too high. I'm currently stuck against a biomechanical monster called "The Nightmare" whose body constantly crashes into you and is impossible to avoid. At any rate, this is shaping up to be the best Metroid I've ever played....better than Super, better than Prime, even better than everybody's favorite, Other M....and I'm certain that when I do finish it, I'd put it here.

 

People have mixed opinions on Vagrant Story. It has the best-looking polygonal environments of any PS1 title and the translated script by Alexander O. Smith is top rate. There's no doubt it's an underappreciated cult classic. It's the combat that splits people apart.

The way you fight in this game is unlike any other: you approach an enemy, hit the X button and the action freezes while a circular grid highlights a portion of the monster's body. Press X again and you strike -- but if you push it another time right before your weapon connects, you will strike a second time....and if you time it correctly again, you'll make a third blow. If you're good at chaining your attacks this way, you can make short work of a lot of bad guys.....if your weapon doesn't break.

This is the hang-up everybody has: different weapons need to be used for different types of monsters or your attacks will be very weak against some of them. In addition, you have to make these weapons yourself in various item workshops spread throughout the deserted city the game takes place in. AND....you have to make new ones because your old ones will dull over time.

People who couldn't make sense of this mechanic disliked the game as a result. I never had a problem with it, and I loved the game. I want a sequel, but...that's never gonna happen.

 

At the time I picked up Nine Hours, Nine Persons, Nine Doors -- now renamed post-release as "Zero Escape: 999" to make it less cumbersome to refer to -- I hadn't partaken in much gaming in a while. Most of the titles I bought, I would fiddle with for one or two hours and then get bored. This was the game that revitalized my interest in the hobby. Right after this I played Portal 2, which sucked me back in for good.

A common trait among games on my list is "uniqueness," and this is another one-of-a-kind (I guess rarity makes the heart grow fonder). 999 is a "visual novel," which is what it sounds like -- a whole lot of text published as a video game. Generally these aren't translated for audiences outside of Japan because there's a fear Westerners would become bored easily. The difference between 999 and most of its kind is that there IS some actual gameplay in it...there's a lot of reading, but it's really a puzzle-solving game.

You're on a sinking ship with nine other people, each of which are rigged to explode if they can't get past the various traps and riddles in each room. A tight, unpredictable storyline keeps you playing -- and you'll be playing many times, because it's impossible to win the first time. You must replay the game several times to find the correct path where everyone survives; six at least to see all the endings. This repetitiveness knocks it all the way down to #9 (how ironic, right?) but it's still a memorable title I'll never forget, and neither will you, once you play it. So play it.

 

Jeanne D'Arc is the sole reason I own a PSP (that, and the PSP was free -- thanks, Eileen). Level 5 (they of Professor Layton) are one of the best Japanese development studios of today's modern age. Jeanne is their strategy game, which loosely follows the life of Joan of Arc (and I mean so loosely that large burly monsters are involved in the Hundred Years' War). There are a lot of strategy titles I find frustrating (FF Tactics, I'm looking at you) but Jeanne is perfectly balanced. You can be at a disadvantage and still find a way to turn it around, be it a special attack (Jeanne has a Super Saiyan form that lasts 3 turns...yes, you read that) or a well-used item. For some reason there's been a set of parentheses in every sentence of this paragraph (but hopefully you haven't noticed).

FACT: The voice of Jeanne D'Arc looks like Jeanne D'Arc.

 

If I truly want to waste my time, there's no better way than through NIS's Disgaea series. I appreciate it for its constant efforts to break gaming convention, but what I truly do it for is the satisfaction of smiting an enemy using a weapon that I had to spend four hours traversing randomly-generated maps to level up. Most people don't have the patience for this kind of thing anymore. But there's a kind of madness to it that gets me hooked, the kind that says "This character is fine on her own, but I bet I could make her twice as powerful if I reincarnated her two times and packed her crossbow with Eros Innocents." I'm more aware playing Disgaea than I am with any other title that I'm accomplishing nothing in real life while I play it, and there's the guilt, but darn it, it's fun and that's the problem. You don't have to grind to complete a Disgaea game, but you'll be missing a lot. It's Grinding: The Series.

 

EVERY MARIO GAME
I couldn't pick between them and it seemed too easy to put one here.

EARTHBOUND
Wasn't it #1 the last time I made this list? Ah well.
No, you can't have my cartridge.

GITAROO MAN
Because it's Gitaroo Man.

CLICK ONE OF MY ENTRIES IN "THE TOP 5 GREATEST VIDEO GAME LINES OF ALL TIME" TO RETURN TO THE MAIN PAGE

"Congrats on finishing the game. Now get a life!" --Eiji Nakamura, in the Chrono Trigger "Developers Ending"

".....And Weena Mercator as the hopping woman." --in the credits for Star Wars: Shadows of the Empire

"I'm hungly. May I have two beafboals?" --the FF8 debug room

"Drown to death in puke!!! Don't you think that's an incredibly masculine taunt to throw at you??" --EarthBound

"Thank you, Mario. But our princess is in another castle!
Just kidding." --Princess Peach, Super Mario 3